For My Mother

My mother didn't want me, she already had a daughter. Her son died when

he was young and mothering was not in her genes. She came from a lifestyle

where the hired help raised your children, that is how she was raised. I had

a nanny, I called her nana (her real name was Mary and she married my

dad's chauffer). I do not know how long nana was with me, I told her once

that my mom didn't love me. She said that was ok because she loved me.

After my dad died, my mother went on to run his business for a few short

years. I was placed in the home of one of my dad's friends (they were forced to take me). What I did not know was my mother was fighting to bring me

home. Her last fight came when she showed up one day at my junior high, she was not alone, Russell Thayer Tutt came also. In the principals office (Mr. Place, the principal was also there) she begged Tutt to let her take me home, he refused he said she could have his children but it would come with a price. She pleaded for me, crying that she wanted her own child. Tutt told her that he was more powerful

then the president of the united states and for her to take one more look at me because she

would never see me again. My mother cringed.

He escorted my mother out of the office and it was the last time I saw her. Her parting words were "I love you, rosebud."

This is part of a song I wrote for my mother:

She wasn't the virgin Mary or Esther the famous queen

but she was the greatest woman I knew, she was mom

sweet mom to me

You won't find a book written about her or a painting that

holds her face, it's in my heart this woman is famous

It's in my heart she has a place.

Happy Mother's Day, Momma